Mechthild Clark
I feel very honored today to be here with you again and to have the opportunity to speak to you. Last year, I spoke to you in German—my native language—and a sister who is fluent in German translated for me.
Today, I am speaking in English—a language I had to learn—and I will be beautifully translated by a person who speaks fluent English.
However, I can assure you that in this lifetime I will NEVER be able speak to you in your beautiful language – desculpa –perhaps when we meet in eternity…
A whole year has passed and a lot has happened to all of us – some things were really great, some events made us very sad – some situations should change, but have not!
But we all know that life fluctuates. That it never stands still. It develops.
And there is one topic close to my heart that has to do with this development and these changes that happen to us.
How do I deal with changes?
How do I adapt to hard situations like loss or sickness?
Is it even possible to adapt to some changes?
And so my topic is called:
In search of contentment
Subtitle: Contentment – it’s not what you sometimes imagine it to be!
I am a person with a vivid imagination and can immediately picture everything someone tells me. I smell, hear, and feel everything. Sometimes that’s good, and sometimes it’s bad! When I hear a certain word, I immediately have certain associations. And that’s what happens to me when I think of the word contentment, for example. The following image immediately comes to mind:
- I have a carefree existence!
- I am never overworked and I don’t get upset about anything or anyone – Especially not about my husband.
- I am always cool and calm.
- I always come up with the right answer and the right topic of conversation.
- All my relationships are characterized by encouragement and mutual respect.
- When difficult times arise—which, of course, happens very rarely—I am resilient and tough!
- I can handle anything and still remain friendly. I can help everyone and never tire of doing so.
- And when someone asks me how I am, I can happily say: I am completely satisfied!
Surely, the image that each of us has of contentment looks a little different. But I think that for all of us, there is a little bit of a desire for a “perfect world”, a “perfect life”, no worries, and serenity. We are at peace with everything and everyone.
Surely, we have all had isolated moments or days when all of the above is true, but I can tell you: the majority of my days look different.
- Fears arise, and sometimes a little bit of panic sets in out of the blue because I feel like I can’t cope with a situation.
- Difficult circumstances weigh on me.
- Relationships disappoint me.
- I simply cannot find answers to some open questions.
- Friendships don’t last.
- My children go their own ways or make decisions I don’t approve of.
- I experience loss through death, e.g., parents and siblings, or sometimes even my own child.
- Illness strikes suddenly.
Should I list more? I think we all get the picture!
And by now we all know that life is very mixed!
- There is light and shadow.
- Mountains and valleys.
- Sometimes long dry spells like being in a desert!
- Sometimes refreshing moments like in an oasis.
- And sometimes everything I mentioned happens on one day.
So, what does it really mean to be contented or exist in a mental state of contentment? I love definitions of words. So, I sometimes look them up in a dictionary. In the past, it was a real book, but today it’s Google…
My German dictionary defines contentment like this:
1) being inwardly balanced and not wanting anything more than what one has;
2) being satisfied with the given circumstances, achievements, or similar, having nothing to complain about.
As an adjective, one is content (for example, with oneself and the world).
But what does the Word of God, the Bible, say about this?
Paul says in Phil. 4:12–13:
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
When we examine the life and work of the Apostle Paul in the New Testament, we know that he did not have a carefree existence. He went through trials and tribulations, was beaten, cast out, persecuted and on and on. So, we clearly see in his epistles what contentment is NOT. And I would like to briefly address a few misconceptions:
- Contentment does not mean that my life is completely carefree!
Being content also does not simply mean that we never encounter problems or confrontations. It does not mean that we always have this picture-perfect life that everyone dreams of.
Again, we hear from Paul:
2 Cor. 1:8:
Dear brothers and sisters, I want you to know that we had to endure severe trials in the province of Asia. We were at our wits’ end and had already given up on life.
Wow – the great apostle is powerless, doesn’t know what to do, thinks his life is over… And that is just one of many passages where he describes his difficulties.
So: even in a contented life, there are difficulties and hardships!
- Contentment does not mean that there are no relationship conflicts in my life.
We read what Paul writes when he has to defend himself against false accusations:
2 Cor. 2:4:
I wrote to you with great concern, with a heavy heart and with tears. But I did not want to hurt you. On the contrary! You should rather recognize how much I love you.
Paul really suffered, and you can feel that in every word. And I think that if you live long enough, you quickly learn that not all relationships in life last. That sometimes there are even relationship conflicts within our own families. People totally misunderstand us. Marriages break down, children don’t want to talk to their parents…
Conclusion: Even in a contented life, there are relationship conflicts, a heavy heart, tears, despair.
- A contented existence also sometimes includes unfulfilled heart’s desires or a longing for an improved life situation.
Sometimes it also includes crying out and pleading for God’s intervention. We think of Paul and his “thorn in the flesh”. We don’t know exactly what this was, but we know that Paul asked God three times to remove this thorn. And it didn’t happen…
And what did God say to Paul? “My grace is sufficient for you.”
I think of my daughter.
- Being content does not mean that I no longer have fears or find myself in threatening situations.
Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 7:5:
For when we came into Macedonia, we had no rest, but we were harassed at every turn—conflicts on the outside, fears within.
This is just one of many passages in the Bible that show that Paul faced real dangers. And we know that he was beaten, that he was imprisoned—and all because he wanted to proclaim God’s word and spread it throughout the world. He had real fears… Just like we sometimes have…
- Even a contented person is always engaged in an inner struggle to decide to do what is right.
God did not create puppets. Every decision we make has an impact on our lives. Sometimes we make good decisions, sometimes not so good ones, and sometimes even deliberately bad ones. Paul understood this struggle very well!
Again, Paul in Romans 7:15:
I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
Should I tell a little lie? In English they are sometimes called “white lies”. Sounds harmless, right? Should I just not tell the cashier at Pingo doce that she gave me too much money back? Should I watch the movie that isn’t really good for me? I have to decide every day to do and to say the right thing!
A good and clear conscience helps to develop a contented lifestyle, because I am not troubled by deception.
Wilhelm von Humboldt, a German philosopher and writer said:
Most people make themselves dissatisfied simply by making excessive demands on fate. – They want to much!
Now I have painted a picture to show us what true contentment does NOT mean. That contentment does not really refer to the state of our actual life, but to the state, the attitude of our soul, our innermost being. And the question automatically arises:
- How can I now combine both – on the one hand, the desire for a contented attitude and, on the other hand, the reality of my life?
- How can I train my soul so that a contented attitude is part of my being? So that serenity and contentment have room in my heart?
We know one thing for sure: it is not a one-time decision we make. And we have just seen clearly from the previous points that a contented life is not synonymous with a perfect life.
But contentment should be a goal for us as part of the process of coping with life. It is needs to be discovered and requires an effort to achieve. In other words: it does not happen by itself. It does not occur automatically in my life, but I have to struggle to find it as an answer to dissatisfaction and always wanting more from life.
Wikipedia explains to us that this means that we are challenged on this journey to a life of contentment. Our thinking must change, as must our attitude. This is a process that we go through. Have you noticed that every change we desire requires us to take active steps? We have to allow ourselves to change, rethink our thinking, learn to act differently.
Wikipedia takes a human approach, which is very good. But God’s Word, the Bible, shows us how God can and wants to help us in our development, and He takes away the pressure of having to do everything ourselves.
Here are a few points that will put us on the right track:
- Happy people are thankful people. They’re grateful for what they have and aren’t driven by the desire to always have more. And that doesn’t just apply to money or possessions. We are thankful for what we have and for who we have in our lives! We are thankful for our work, for our family. For peace in our country when we watch the evening news.
Again: Phil 4:12a:
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation…
Hebrews 13:5:
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’
Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a Protestant pastor who died in a concentration camp, said: Everything becomes a gift to the grateful person, because they know that they do not deserve anything.
- A person that is content does not compare herself or himself to others.
God created each of us, and each of us is different. We all have a totally unique life. Some situations we find ourselves in, we are responsible for ourselves because of decisions we made, and it is good to take responsibility for them. Other situations we have no influence over. Contented people learn to accept the aspects of life that they cannot change and make the best of them. We accept our fate and no longer rebel against it. We stop comparing ourselves and our lot in life, our situation, our circumstances. We do not compare how we look, our success or the lack of it, our children to other families, the size of our church – because even pastors can fall into this trap of comparison.
Søren Kierkegaard, a Danish philosopher: Comparison is the end of happiness and the beginning of dissatisfaction.
- Content people value relationships and are more interested in people than in things. They invest their lives in relationships and are happy when they can do good for others. They know that great human relationships are the highest good next to their relationship with God. And that applies to our family, our children, friends, neighbors, our community, etc.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5 and 13 NLB:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
We treat others with respect and acceptance, even when it is hard…
- Content people have the heart of a servant. These are words we don’t like to hear in our society, at least in Germany, because we immediately think of doormats. But doing something good for others, whether it’s our family, a neighbor, or even a stranger, has nothing to do with humbling ourselves.
Jesus came into this world to serve! He was the Son of God! He washed feet…
Mother Teresa who truly had the heart of a servant: Those who give joy, give the most. Christ will not ask us how much we have achieved, but with how much love we have accomplished our deeds.
- Content people celebrate everyday life and enjoy the little things in life.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18:
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
We sometimes have to discover gratitude for the little things in life – nature, a sunset, running water, heating! We experience so many good things in a day, but we take them for granted. Often, we don’t even notice them and therefore don’t feel grateful for them.
But interestingly: when a difficult situation arises during the day, our thoughts fixate on it and cloud our perspective – even on the blessings we have experienced before.
How sad is that! Let us learn to be grateful for the small, beautiful moments in life and celebrate them and to be more aware…
- Contentment comes from our devotion to Christ and appreciation of heavenly riches.
Contented people have committed themselves to something greater than themselves! This means, among other things, that their thoughts and aspirations are not limited to their own little world. They concentrate on their relationship to their Savior.
Phil 3:13-14:
Brothers, I do not consider myself to have attained this, but one thing I do: I forget what is behind and reach forward to what is ahead, and I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
For me, this is almost the most important point in the search for contentment, because this is where it all begins… I look to what I have in Christ and to my future with Christ! Life does not end here for us…
So, I have to ask myself the question today: AM I TRULY CONTENT? Can I accept my life as it is and wish for nothing more?
God has done a lot in my life and has been guiding and leading me for more than 50 years now. I can’t imagine any other life. And the more I have experienced His goodness and care in my life, and the more I have put Him first in my life, the more satisfied I have become with my life. But is has been and is a process!
So today I can say: Yes, I am a deeply content person and I am so grateful for my life.
Do I have problems? Do I have questions or sometimes fears? Yes, yes and yes …
But that does not change the fact that I feel safe with God, accepted and protected by Him. And I can say with David:
Psalm 62:2
Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him.
Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I shall never be shaken.
An example of a truly content person despite difficulties…
I would like to conclude with some advice from the Psalms.
Again, King David:
Psalm 37:3–8:
Trust in the LORD and do what is right; then you will live in the land and dwell securely. Seek your happiness in the LORD; he will fulfill your every desire. Leave the guidance of your life to the LORD; trust in him, for he will do what is right! He will make your good deeds visible as the light of day, and your faithfulness will shine like the noonday sun.
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him. Do not fret when people succeed in doing evil, when those who act wickedly prosper. Do not be envious of those who do wrong, or be jealous of those who do evil.
And again, the Apostle Paul in Phil. 4:12-13:
I know what it is to be in need, and know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
Let us pray:
Dear Heavenly Father, I come before you today seeking the gift of contentment. Please help me to love the life I live right now and find peace in my current circumstances.
Forgive me for the times I have complained, compared my life to others, or allowed greed to enter my heart. Guard me against the lies of needing ‘more’ to be happy, and help me instead to focus on the eternal, lasting blessings I already have.
Lord, teach me to be grateful for both the small and great blessings that surround me each day. Grant me the grace to trust in Your provision, knowing that You are my ultimate source of security and joy.
Calm the storms of anxiety within my heart and remind me to walk with a spirit of humility and gratitude, regardless of whether I have a little or a lot, whether I well or sick…
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.